Snail consciousness

Under stimulation in an overstimulated world

Hello you,

It’s been a while since I’ve had a longing to connect here or anywhere outside of my own community spaces. I remember when Instagram was “community” for me and it was lockdown that shattered that illusion, amongst many others. And inevitably led to the creation of Mother Nurture and its seeds of potential.

I’ve been offline for some time now. I take regular breaks to keep my dopamine levels in a state of health. But it has been longer than usual as I could feel symptoms of burn out temp me into total collapse.

I say tempt because by the time we are that close to annihilation, feeling bad actually feels good. I know you know what I mean. I can get away with very little these days because INTEGRITY chose me. Relative to most people however, I don’t look like I’m “overworking”, burning out or not taking care of myself. In fact, it’s quite the opposite! Especially because I am not like most people and the normalisation of being deeply unwell and stressed and sick is at the foundation of modern humanism.

But you don’t see what’s in the shadows. What seemingly innocent boundary I am overriding, or aspect of self, I am abandoning.

There is a moment for many, or rather, many moments for many, that we decide we are in service to Truth. That we no longer want to be asleep. I had to be reminded over and over again between 2007 and 2017, that being awake was worth it. That Truth and Integrity were the expression of my soul’s dharma. That no matter how hard it got to let go of the comforts of being a modern, dumbed down, lazy human as a divine expression of consciousness, it was worth it.

Now I don’t need to be convinced, by any means. It is a pulse I feel daily, like my breath. It is never not there. And sure there are other things I forget, (this is our condition after all, to forget and then to remember). But Truth is a consciousness and is the burning bright light that beams through me every day calling me home to wholeness.

Anything that does not serve the consistent beat of that pulse, becomes glaringly obvious - sometimes thankfully, sometimes painfully.

As much as I believe technology to be part of the evolution of consciousness at this time - it’s part evil and part good, like everything else. We can choose to be in service to the extremes or we can embody the third force of neutrality.

Being on my phone, more than I need to be, (TRULY - as in, let’s be really honest about this) is not in service to the pulse.

I could list all the reasons, but I’m not here to convince you of what you already know.

Although this piece made the pulse beat deeper and faster as if it serves the great awakening being evoked out of all of us…. (because it does).

Clearly Tommy Dixon is someone in his dharma. Inspired.

What I will share however is how this all relates to motherhood, because to be a Mother is a unique and distinctive operating system. Anyone trying to sell me any way of life that is inspiring beyond comprehension is often, not a parent. I am already existing in a stimulating environment 90% of the time due to the nature of parenthood. Physiologically my phone only adds more stimulation and distraction to a reality that is already hard.

If I want my life to feel less stimulating I must stop stimulating myself. Quite simple really. But super easy to blame everyone and everything else.

Hardly ever does my phone serve me, unless I am connecting with and building my community (not on Instagram). This is the neutrality piece, I use technology to serve my real life. The pulse responds well to this. The more we interrogate this though, the more we shed and the greater quality the digital spaces we consciously CHOOSE to inhabit are, instead of mindlessly using them to only check out.

I have two incredibly simulating children. My husband, too, is quite loud, as is my dog. I love them dearly and there is no need to change or fix this about them. What I can change however is how stimulated I am by things that are not serving me. So I have more capacity to handle normal levels of stimulation from being a witch// visionary, wife and mother of two wild boys and a dog.

To be a witch is an important addition to woman and mother, because it adds layers of sensitivity and organic alchemy that take place simply by existing in spaces where people need “healing”. (fyi: everyone needs healing). I don’t have to do much at all, existing is enough for the alchemy to begin to happen THROUGH ME.

(I’m working on these boundaries and what protection looks like for me when the consciousness of the alchemist takes over)

Maybe this is going over your head. I say it anyway, for those who get it.

Things I have been enjoying in my time of being an under stimulated snail:

I’m subscribed to very few newsletters these days, as on social media (when I am there), I am following maximum 9 people / frequencies at a time. Even that becomes too much, often. I absolutely do not use it to keep up to date with everyones lives / meals / exercise regimes / parenting styles / weekend holidays.

I use it as a tool for consciousness and comedy, only.

• I have LOVED receiving emails from Clara Belize Wisner - getting to know her all over again and enjoying the simplicity of her medicine.

• I am also reading two books:

One which was recommended to me by a Mother Nurture Alumni, dear friend and shamanic sister of alchemy, Amelie Desbiens:

The first time I opened this book I wept in awe. This is one of those books you can only absorb from snail consciousness and in small bites.

I’m also reading If Women Rose Rooted by Sharon Blackie, a recommendation but I can’t recall by who. Likely another Mother Nurture gem.

(I am so blessed to be surrounded by the most wise, willing and conscious women who are devoted with me, to being sovereign and free from dogma, competition and facades)

Of course two chapters in, whilst on the first of two camping trips we’ve done since October, I almost fell off my hammock when my eyes landed upon Celtic mythology stories of Madron(a) the Celtic Divine Mother Goddess and her son, Mabon. I knew immediately she was somehow connected to my ancestry as a Mabin. I was right.

I’ve already done some ancestral walks through Celtic lands during my time in the UK, but there is a deeper invitation coming through the magic of this book.

• I’ve been speaking with the dead too this month: My oldest friend Cindy and my grandmother Olive who has also returned to me somewhat through the vessel of my dear friend Jen, whose twin daughter is also named Olive.

I am receiving so much being witness to the force that is a twin mother, tandem breastfeeding her babies and surrendering to the chaos that is three children in a blended family.

Jen, Olive and Wren.

Jen, you are a consistent inspiration. And thank you for all the oxytocin.

Speaking of ancestors, it is the month of the dead after all, so of course the first ripe lemon fell from our tree that was planted in honour of Marlee, alongside her ashes this year.

Creative Counsel’s second cohort came to a close in October. This is when burn out crept out from the corners to warn me. I am so charged by my work. I open up to become a literal channel that when the container closes, as does my channel and that can dramatically effect my energy levels and be a jarring transition to manage.

You’ll hear more from me on what CC is and what’s next year’s cohort will look like, but here are some testimonials to wet your tastebuds.

I came in with zero expectations so to say I was blown away is an understatement. I came in with the intention of being held through what I knew was a huge adjustment period in my life as well as huge goals I had set for the year. This community and its medicine, made me feel witnessed, supported, and alive again. I have learnt so much about others, Amy’s wisdom, about myself…. I am a completely different human than when we started. It was magic 🪄

- Kendall

Love Amy so much. Gain so much wisdom from her and feel so seen, understood and completely myself in all my imperfect ways in her orbit. Really truly profound.

- Caroline

When invited to describe creative counsel to a friend, Ruth said:

I know this is such a cop out answer but it also feels like the truth: you kind of just have to do it! I think everyone in the container has a different experience depending on what they are seeking and how they engage with the material. I guess I would say it is a container for raw creativity and vulnerability that can hold you while you explore your edges around topics like creativity, business, motherhood, womanhood, purpose, desire etc

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Creative Counsel coming to an end was alongside a huge expansive call in Mother Nurture with my husband Bradley, as a guest. (Purchase the replay here).

The come down was hard, following both. And we have been in a contraction naturally, ever since.

Things are levelling out though now, in the home and thanks to me being a snail. As well as in the field of my work, with Mother Nurture members leaving after 3 long years of service, and some new exciting members joining; matching the quality at which we are serving LIFE.

I am often in awe of who the space attracts - very little to do with “me’, but rather the Integrity and Truth of the field we co-create.

I am starting with a new client today who is visiting me in my studio. I plant my seeds here of a dream to live on land that has enough space for me to hold community events and ceremonies. For now my tiny sacred garage hut will do. And does do!

That being said, I continue to serve women online, which you can read more about here.

Space is limited before December so if you want to RECEIVE from this wellspring of silent wisdom stirring in me, now is the time to book.

In love and service to consciousness, even when its dark and messy,

Amy